Gay Lives Matter

I consider myself to be open minded. I love my gay friends and family and I respect and admire the courage it must take to live openly as gay when society condemns a gay lifestyle and some consider it sinful. As a Christian, the God I know loves all of us regardless of who we love.

I have often thought it would be sad if either of my children turned out to be gay. It could never change my love for them; however, I would selfishly mourn not having biological grandchildren and I would worry about the obstacles they would face in gaining acceptance from others. So when a friend of mine with 3 boys said she had always hoped one of her boys would be gay, I wasn’t just surprised – I was shocked. She explained that it would be so fun to have another son or son in law in her life that she could swap recipes with and get fashion and decorating ideas from. Of course this makes it sound like all gay men have a keen sense of design. (Maybe they do). I really admire my girlfriend’s open heart and really love that about her.

Yesterday morning after enjoying a visit from my college friend Gina and husband Wes, Erik helped me with a number of tasks at home. We (actually “he”) changed lightbulbs, hung pictures, moved furniture to the storage room and fixed a door knob. When we were ready to sit down and relax for a while we decided to watch the Nexflix version of Queer Eye. Now is where I switch to my Siskel and Ebert mode.

First of all, this show is about helping others with their fashion, grooming, food, culture and design.  They had me at Hello. (While I have heard of the original Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, I have never watched it.)

Let’s talk about Jonathon. His is my FAV of the FAB 5. Not only is he funny af; he is expressive, cute, joyful, and so full of life. Some would describe him as flamboyant. I wonder if I could figure out a way for him to style my hair? If he would simply touch my hair my life would be complete. I imagine growing my hair long like his and we go out dancing, flipping our hair back and laughing and impressing others with our sexy dance moves. He could totally be my BFF. In a word, I am OBSESSED. But I digress.

Beyond the fun clothing, hairstyles, recipes (including Sangria!), culture and home makeovers is the life changing experiences of the men that are impacted by the work of the FAB 5, five gay men who each have an area of expertise that they lend to a straight man. As I spent my afternoon glued to the TV I alternated between tears and laughter so many times I was an emotional hot mess. I poured some wine and proceeded to watch every episode.

As the FAB 5 interact with strangers who become friends, I am overcome with emotion watching the connections they are making and how it has broken down barriers between religious zealots and gay men, and cops and black men. I see the courage it took for a man to tell his mom he is gay and I can relate to the heartache of families that have lost a dad and husband, struggling with how much they miss their loved one. I have seen the renewed love between a husband and wife that are so overwhelmed raising their children that they do not take time for themselves or each other. In a word, I see LOVE.

As I watch incredible stories of love and acceptance,  I can’t help but think about the brokenness and political divide in our country.  I feel like the FAB 5 are highlighting our differences in a way that is healing and loving, and liberating, one contestant and one viewer at a time.

So while I am open minded, this show has opened my heart in a way that feels so right.  While I know that neither of my kids are gay, I can always hope for a gay grandchild.