Dear Dad,
You would not believe the week I’ve had. Obviously with the second anniversary of your death, I’ve been (slightly) more emotional than usual. I also decided it was a great time to start a 30 day cleanse, so my body is all out of whack (I do feel good though). Adding in the stressful, busy week I’ve had at work, all I wanted at the end of each day was to call you.
You were the best listener (and talker, too). You were always only a phone call away and you know just what to say to cheer me up or distract me long enough for me to forget about whatever was going on that day. I can’t believe it’s been two years since I’ve heard your voice. I miss it so much, even your smokers cough.
A lot has happened since the first anniversary of your passing. Last year I made promises to talk about you more, share your compassion and friendliness with those around me, be a friend to everyone and make tym for the people and things I love. I like to think I’ve been able to do all those on top of starting a new job (and being promoted, too), meeting some amazing new friends that I know will be lifelong friends, and starting wedding planning. It isn’t easy to do any of it without you here but I know you are always with me in spirit.
Speaking of your spirit, on Father’s Day, Nic and I were browsing prints at a stand at Bonnaroo and he came across one with Spirit in the Sky written in a bird. That was the clearest sign I’ve received from you so far.
The dogs serve as my daily reminder to make tym. Nic and I are more often on their schedule rather than they are on ours. I still need to work on the patience and not always being in a hurry to get to where I’m going (my license plate serves as my reminder there). I wish you would’ve met them. You would’ve loved Pumpkin’s sassy attitude and Reggie’s need to be around his family.
The friends I’ve made this past year have gotten to know you through the stories and memories I’ve shared with them and I think you would’ve really liked them. I think you would especially my friend Dani. She has helped me through my grief in ways she probably doesn’t realize. When I first met her, she had recently lost her dad, too. While she is a (little) older than me, it was still so comforting to have someone know what I was feeling and going through. I hope you’ve met her dad up there, I think you two would get along great in matching Hawaiian shirts on the beach.
I’m so grateful for the 22 years I got with you. I only wish it could have been more. I miss you more as the days and years continue to go by.
Love you always, your little girl
P.S. As I wrote this from my backyard, playing with the dogs, I noticed 3 hawks flying overhead. Thank you for the constant reminder that you are always there watching over and protecting me.
