Dear Dad,
Guess what! I’m engaged!
The past few days have been filled with euphoria and excitement for my future with Nic, but it has also magnified the absence of you.
I wish so much that you could’ve been there. You were the one missing piece of an otherwise perfect proposal. Nic picked out the most beautiful setting and band to compliment the diamond you gave to mom.
In true Rick fashion, I could tell it was coming, I found some clues leading me to believe a ring might be under the tree. I didn’t want to ruin the surprise so I kept it (mostly) to myself. Nic did however, figure out I knew something. But he still caught me off guard by proposing at the beginning of the gift exchange at Kelli & Jim’s Christmas Eve party. Mom and Erik were right next to me and they were just as surprised as I was. (He told them he was proposing Christmas Day). Hannah even Facetimed Grandma and Aunt Dianna so they could be included, too.
Although I can’t imagine anything better than spending the rest of my life with Nic, I’ve somewhat dreaded a proposal because it would mean I had to plan the be there. The thought of you not walking me down the aisle or dancing to Butterfly Kisses with me just breaks my heart all over again.
In therapy, I’ve talked through what my wedding might look like without you physically there. I have a few perfect ways to incorporate you and your spirit in our dig day but it’s still going to be painful.
Rebecca Pearson put it best when she said “The happiest moments will also be a little sad”.
